Why I Don’t Have A Best Friend

When I was a little, one of my friends told me, “I have friends, and I have best friends. You are in my best friends group.”

In a later conversation with my mom, we talked about the meaning of friendship. Those days people were lumping everybody into the category of “friend,” even if they weren’t close with those people. People would call others “friends” who were really acquaintances or people they may be friendly with, and they would call their true friends their “best friends.”

Since I was home schooled, I was lucky to form any relationship I could with people my age. I valued anybody I came into contact with. There was really no point to categorizing people I knew into “friends” and “best friends” when really I meant “acquaintances” and “friends.” So I decided that I didn’t want to have, nor did I want to be a “best friend,” I wanted a true friend.

I guess a true friend is much like what people call a best friend. I view a true friend as being someone who is there for you when you need her, willing to help you out when you’re in trouble, and wanting to spend time with you just because.

Now that I’m in college, I still don’t consider myself as having a “best friend.” A best friend to me sounds exclusive, like you can only have a certain number of best friends. But I do have true friends. Sure, I use the word “friend” lightly at times, perhaps if I am referring to people I am friendly with, or people who could be potential true friends if my relationship with them were to grow. But my true friends are the people I know I can count on.

It’s my goal to not only have true friends, but I also want to be a true friend. I am not perfect, but if you are my friend, I want to be there for you if you need me. Sometimes scheduling in the midst of college can be tough, but I will make a way to be there. I can listen if you need to talk. And I’ll do what I can to help if you need help. If you don’t need help, let’s just hang out and eat food sometime, but please excuse my sarcastic sense of humor. That comes with my friendship.

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